Dr. Leroy Brown

So our little picture of obedience went to get schooled every Monday for 6 weeks in a row.



Mmmm tampon box.

He graduated this week to much fanfare. There was puppy cake:

We were able to set it in front of him and tell him to "wait."

And then he ate it in 2 bites. They played a game in class to review everything they learned. Leroy came in 7th place and got a prize!

Okay, maybe there were only seven dogs in the class. In any event, he takes the it all very seriously.

And since he has an education, we decided it was time he got a job.

We certainly don't have time to do the laundry anymore.

How to shop for jeans.

1. Try on several pairs and get upset.
2. Almost convince yourself that you can keep wearing the pair you have.
3. Realize you won't be able to participate in jeans Friday as you current pair violate several items in the dress code (e.g. It is suggested that staff wear clothing that do not expose staff’s crotch or ass).
4. Try on more jeans.
5. Discover that you are too short, too hippy, and generally not proportional.
6. Try on a pair of jeans one size bigger than your normal size.
7. Relish the luxurious spaciousness of bigger jeans.
8. Buy bigger jeans.
9. Wear jeans for one day.
10. Remember that jeans relax after wearing.
11. Fail.
12. Resolve that you will have to either gain weight or wear jeans that are too big for you for the rest of your life because you are sure as hell not going jeans shopping ever again.

Happy Friday.

The photo is courtesy of Miss Molly McMullen and was taken in Ocean City, Maryland Labor Day weekend 2004 I believe.

Don't kiss Leroy

Turns out that if I only blog when I have something interesting to say, I never blog. Instead, I’ll update you all on a series of mundane happenings in my life. I hope you enjoy the redesign (if picking a different template and clicking okay counts as a redesign) of the site. During the dreariness of this season, I thought a bit of brightness could be nice.

Monday was our first puppy school class with puppies (the first was parents only). The teacher tried to put certain dogs in certain corners so as to minimize barking. She made the mistake of putting Leroy in the center of the room. He took turns setting off 3 other dogs into barking matches. The teacher used him as an example for two exercises and he proved that he will enthusiastically do anything for food.

Jack is homeschooled on Tuesday nights. This means one of us takes him into a room and shuts the door to work on the exercises we learned in class. Leroy sits outside the door and complains. Apparently Jack’s natural obedience is more a product of his lack of curiosity and laziness. Mostly when I do the exercises with him he stares at me with a sort of blank/confused look on his face. He is not accustomed to having to do anything more than sit and/or balance things on his head for treats.

And for the final and unfortunate puppy-related update—Leroy is a poop eater. His own, other dogs’, it doesn’t matter to him. I think Leroy equates walk time with open buffet time more than potty time. The first time I realized he had something in his mouth on a walk I made the unwise choice to go in after it. I do not make that mistake anymore. I have seen dogs eat poop before, but never with this kind of gusto.

Close to a resolution

I watched Oprah last night and this week it’s all about living your best life. I thought about how it might be nice to drink less, eat healthier, and exercise more. Maybe I’d even start some of those gummy Flintstone vitamins. Kenny pointed out that we’d have to do all of those things when we had a baby anyway. No need to start now. I still might try those gummy vitamins.

Important Matters

Leroy is going to go to school to learn how to be a good boy. He is a good dog at the moment in that I have no doubt he would survive in the wild and keep himself well fed. We’re going to start him in a class where we give him treats in exchange for not being so dog-ish and also not so mountain goatish. We keep finding him sitting on top of things like his cage, his food container, our countertops.

Last night Kenny forgot that we have two dogs. Jack is comparatively quiet and hard to see. You’re usually all—hey, where’s Jack? Only to realize he is directly behind you or next to you. Last night I heard Jack crying and thought perhaps his collar had gotten stuck to a blanket or something. As I was already in bed and thus unable to move, I asked Kenny to find out what was wrong with Jack. He said, “Oh he’s fine. He’s sitting on the couch.” I called Jack. Leroy came. Jack continued to cry. It was then that Kenny realized the crying was coming from the hallway outside our apartment. Apparently Jack did not make it back through the door after Kenny had taken the boys out about ten minutes prior. He must have sat there for at least five minutes without making a sound—patiently waiting for his father to remember him.

Man I talk about my dogs a lot. Sorry about that. I will think of something not dog related for next time.

People who have wronged me

I always do this. I don’t post for weeks at a time and then I feel the need to post less than 24 hours later. Oh well. Here goes.

Lindsey reminded me that I neglected to mention the great injustice wrought upon the Kodkagel and Johnson households this weekend. A few weeks ago we discovered that Lindsey was to arrive in Chicago days before we were to leave Chicago. She has family in Rockford, IL see. There was great joy and celebration at the revelation that Lindsey could not only come by for a short visit—but that she could even stay overnight with us. Wine was stockpiled. The guest room was prepared. Her flight was supposed to get in around 11:00 am. I am sure you can see where this is going. Since she was both flying United and flying into O’hare (the black hole we call an airport) I was certain we could expect her around 4 or 5 that evening. The weather was mildly cooperative. Her plane was not. United kept my Lindsey on a play for like 4 hours and didn’t take her anywhere. They also wouldn’t give her a meal voucher, and I’m pretty sure they made unkind insinuations about her mother. They cancelled her flight and refused to bring her to Chicago until the following evening—completely cancelling what was going to be a wonderful visit. This is not the first time United has wronged Lindsey, but it will be the last.

Also, there is a bit of a blizzard going on outside the office windows right now. It’s gonna be a fun drive to St. Louis in a few hours! At least we’re not putting our faith in United to get us there. They would probably hold our puppies hostage and make us go to Cincinatti or something. I’m pretty sure they do that sort of thing.